Why do we women sometimes feel the need to do it all? We want to be perfect wives, mothers, friends, neighbors, school and church volunteers, and entrepreneurs. And when we feel like we don’t measure up to perfect in any of these areas, we get down on ourselves. We feel like failures.
But we tend to forget….we’re not SuperMom, we’re a human mom. We aren’t wired to do it all. And, more importantly, our kids don’t expect us to. They don’t care if we run a successful business or volunteer in the church nursery. All they want is a mom who is there for them and who loves them, no strings attached.
So how can we be a hero to our kids without having to wear a cape and imprint a big “S” on our chests?
• Just say Yes. When your kids ask you to play, instead of thinking of everything else you have to do, simply say, “OK!” Drop what you’re doing and play a game, read a book, go for a walk, shoot some hoops. Sure, this means you’ll have to just say no to plenty of other things. But by saying yes to your kids, you let them know they’re at the top of your priority list.
• Schedule Play Time. Of course there are other things to be done like work, volunteering and other commitments. But no matter how full your calendar is, be sure to block out a big chunk of time every week to do something fun with the family. Go to the movies, go bowling, or spend the afternoon at the beach. The important thing is that you’re consistent in spending quality (and quantity) fun time with your kids.
• See Eye to Eye. Don’t ever become too busy that you can’t look at your child when he talks to you. Trying to maintain a conversation while typing on your laptop or scrubbing the toilet isn’t easy and your child will pick up on the fact that you’re not really “with him.” When your child has something to say, let him know you’re listening by giving him your full attention.
• Inclusion is everything. Instead of trying to do it all yourself, why not invite your kids to join you during regular tasks such as cooking dinner, dusting the furniture or grocery shopping? Your load will be lessened and some excellent quality time with your kids will be added.
• Pay Attention. Take a little time each day to get to the heart of your child. Whether it’s for ten minutes at bedtime or over breakfast in the morning, ask her about what’s going on in her life. Letting her know you’re there, no matter what, if she needs to talk is the key ingredient in keeping the lines of communication open.
Remember, your kids don’t care if your house is as clean as Martha Stewart’s, you cook as well as Rachel Ray or if you’re as successful as Oprah Winfrey. Being there for your kids and demonstrating your love for them regularly and consistently are the only things you need to do to be a hero in their eyes.
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It is normal for bright, energetic kids to be bored in public school. To solve the problem of "unruly" children, public schools now pressure parents to give their kids potentially dangerous mind-altering drugs. The Graceful Art of Defrazzling - For Mothers 27 Nov 2008 at 11:28am
An introduction to a "defrazzled" method of surviving life as a mother
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